Carry
by Jimmies Jams
Summary: Flame Princess visits Finn's house, looking to right any wrongs between them. Or at least that's what she tells herself.
1. Party

_**Carry**_

She stood in front of a massive tree house. Finn's tree house, to be exact. The damn thing looked like it had been sprayed with silly string, with all the vines covering it. The vines, which seemed to come out of the house itself, sprawling in and out of windows, actually _moved_ occasionally, one at a time, and lightning fast. That was pretty strange. It had only been, what, 9 months? She didn't know why she would bother coming to visit him; he had, after all, been the one to hurt her feelings. But something told her that she had somehow wronged him, and inside this mass of living green she would be able to right that wrong and move on with living, and ruling. Both of which, if you asked her, she was quite contented with. And even if many people had had their lives ruined by the total honesty law, she figured that if you can't live an honest life, you might as well not live at all. Speaking of no life, a certain pink princess happened to open the door, catching her off guard and interrupting her ruminations on her quality of rule. PB looked surprised as well, but then composed herself and looked mad, and sort of… _pitying?_ Like looking at a child who had just spilled a drink all over themselves. FP stepped back sheepishly before quietly saying:

"Hi…"

PB did _not_ look impressed.

"I…uh, hehe… I'm here to see Finn. Is he here?"

PB sighed and jerked her thumb back over her shoulder;

"Come on, Princess, this way".

PB moved aside and let FP enter the treasure room. There wasn't a flat surface in sight. Everything; gold, weapons, gems, electronics, and uh… boxer shorts covered in Finn's face? Well, all _that_ was being slowly moved about by masses of writhing, thorny vines. There was some powerful magic behind this, and before she could stop herself, FP blurted out

"What the Hypotenuse happened here?"

PB stopped just before the ladder upstairs, craned her head upwards and muttered

"Finn".

The treehouse was a lot bigger than she remembered, with corridors completely sealed in with vines, with the occasional window breaking the walls of green. FP followed PB as PB nimbly hopped over thorns and flowers, making sure only to walk on the especially thick vines, some of which were as thick as her waistline, which admittedly wasn't exactly what she prided herself in. Never mind that though, it looked like PB had finally found Finn! Or at least, his room. She grabbed a particularly large vine and slowly started tugging, which revealed an entire panel of the wall coming away. Suddenly, she frowned, then stopped.

"You sure about this?" she asked, not taking her eyes of the 'handle'.

"Sure I am. I mean, this is just a friendly visit, right? Anyway, this is _Finn_ we're talking about. He'd probably just cry if he really was hurt anyway" FP said frantically, doubting herself even as she said it. Was Finn ok with her? Was he mad? Why would he be? And anyway, wasn't that why she had come over anyway? To find out? Shaking her head and those questions away, she quietly said 'yes' and took a step forward. PB sighed and pulled the 'door' open all the way. FP was shocked by what she saw, to say the least.

The room itself was pretty big, with a large dining table and chairs, all of which happened to be totes stocked with all of the hottest, smartest and nicest princesses (that is all of them except for LSP). There was a mountain of candy on the table, and—hold up, CB was here? Wow. At the end of the table, holy cow. Finn was there actually talking to Marceline, Jake, and Lady; and he seemed to have the charisma turned up to full blast because it looked like everyone was completely enraptured by whatever he was saying. He had some sort of massive vine coming from his arm, which fell to the floor and tangled into the mess of all the other vines. But that wasn't important. What was important was the fact that Finn was being incredibly smooth and charismatic in front of at least 10 royalty, he had some pretty hot princesses drooling at him, and he had thrown a princess party and not invited her?! She was getting pretty mad. That inconsiderate jerkhole! He thinks he can throw a fun party with just his closest friends, _bar her?!_ That was just banaynays. And she would bet her life that he'd done it just to make her jealous (Somewhere very far away, Death sneered "You'd like that, wouldn't you fire girl?"). She was at least 200 degrees Celsius, and rising. She suddenly screamed.

"FIINNNNNNNNNNNN! What the hell do you think you're doing, you globbing piece of fire wolf turd!"

Finn suddenly stopped talking, as did everyone. He turned to her, and started shouting: she didn't listen though, why should she care? He suddenly shouted something she should've payed attention to; "THAT'S IT!". Finn spontaneously waved his hand in the air, and suddenly she was in the clutches of a gigantic vine, which had squeezed the air out of her and slowly lifting her over to Finn. She struggled and squirmed; she was genuinely afraid. She was getting hotter and hotter. Hey, _hotter and hotter!_ She could **burn **her way out of this place. She was a flame royal! So she started concentrating, bring her heat up and up and up, 300 degrees, 500 degrees. Suddenly Wildberry princess started screaming: her bodily fluids were evaporating. Finn, however, remained silent. She was now only half a meter away from him, and was burning at 700 degrees. Why the hell—suddenly the vine, which was completely unscathed, squeezed her harder and harder and harder until _snap!_ Her spine broke. She almost immediately fainted.

Her eyes fluttered open. Her head pounded, and she saw red. She tried to get up, but was only met by agony. She screamed and screamed; _why was this happening, what did she do to deserve this?!_ She was screaming and sobbing now. But a deep, quiet voice started talking. The voice was coming from next to her. It was… Finn? Why was he here, he _hated _her. But when she slowly turned her head she saw that he wasn't talking to her. He was covered in massive amounts of burns, bandages and casts. He was crying. Talking to himself. And looking at his wrists it was evident he had cut himself on multiple occasions. What the heck was happening? First, super charisma Finn, and now, sobbing insane Finn? She moved her arm to his face to get his attention. He gasped, and suddenly buried his face in her chest. Sobbing. This is _crazy!_ After about five minutes she quietly said,

"Finn."

He just sort of started sobbing harder, louder into her shoulder now: her chest was completely soaked in tears, which stung a little bit, but she was fine. In fact, she couldn't feel the lower half of her body… _uh oh_.

"F…Finn… What… happened?"

She was struggling to breathe, he was practically on top of her, sobbing.

He eventually calmed down, and was just hiccupping.

"You came to th-the party, an-and-an you shouted at me and I got so _mad_, an-an-and then I just started crushing you and I… I-I thought you d-died! I'm so sorry FP I-I just w-wanted…" He broke down again, just like that. Sobbing. Sometimes she forgot that she was just over a year older than him. She was 16 now, and he was turning 15—wait, that was his birthday! Oh. Finn looked up at that moment, tears, saliva and snot running down his face.

"I-I just d-d-dunno what I would do if I lost you… I love you s-so much and I'm sorry!"

Then it dawned on her. She had come over because she _missed Finn_. And now she realized he was practically begging for her and tearing himself apart over her. He was completely _not _over her. She sighed, and patted his head.

"There there, Finny"

His sobbing slowly receded to crying, then mumbling, then sleep. Face down. On her chest. And only now did she realize that he weighed a ton! And it wasn't helping that his arms were slowly closing in around her, like a vice. Like a bear hug. But soon he relaxed, and he was simply snuggling into her shoulder. He was somehow still almost a foot shorter than her, even after so much time, and started curling up into a ball, wearing a small smile on his face. She could get used to this. After all, with her being a para-something or other and all, she would need someone to protect her. Someone to carry her.

**A/N**

**wa wa wee wa. I had this idea stuck in my head; what if Finn finally let his anger get the better of him? And that led me to: holy balls what if he beat the snot outta Flame Princess? And thus, this was born. I might, y'know, make some more short chapters for the aftermath of this... event.**


	2. Matrix

One day. One day was all it took before had carried her outta that bed and all the way to the Grasslands. Finn was Most of the vines which had been smothering the treehouse were gone, though there was the occasional flash of movement that signified the vines were not, in fact, dead. Just receding. FP was slightly constricted by the vine arm that had wrapped itself once, twice, three times around her shoulders and arms, and his normal hand was firmly underneath her butt (Finn claimed that it was for balance) and his green eyes were sort of glazed over: he was worried about something.

As they closed in on the treehouse, FP took the time to look more closely at Finn's 'vine arm' which had mysteriously replaced his normal right arm. There was a stunningly golden flower sprouting out of the skin on his shoulder, and even the massive thick vine seemed to explode from his scarred flesh, the bases of which were covered in dried blood. The thorns on the vines had torn off the right sleeve of his shirt, and it was evident that the thorns had occasionally torn through his flesh by accident. Ouch. If you looked even closer, which FP didn't, you could see that the human skin itself was starting to turn green and oily. She reached out slowly and carefully to touch it; she was afraid that if she was too fast, too sudden, she might damage his torn up shoulder even more. Her fingers slowly moved over his lean shoulder, and eventually pressed her whole palm against it, and slowly slid her hand over to the vine, and then pushed down—

"OUCH!"

She cried out; she had pressed down on a thorn, which had actually _drawn blood_, which covered her hand. Finn snapped to attention, and whipped his head around and looked at her with fear in his eyes: he did _NOT_ want to sponk up again with the whole 'don't kill your girl' thing. He calmed down when he saw that she wasn't seriously hurt.

"Are you all right, EffPee? What happened?" he asked calmly. Wow. Finn acting calm around a girl who had been hurt?

"Oh, uh, hehe… I just stabbed myself with one of those thorns on your arm."

He raised an eyebrow and then smirked

"Oh, did you get distracted by my stunning good looks, Princess?" he chuckled, smiling down at her. I guess he really _had _gotten super charismatic while she was gone. She smiled back, trying not to grit her teeth from her injured hand; man, that arm could kill someone! Obviously she wasn't trying hard enough though, because he noticed and said

"Well, you want some help? Cause these vines just happen to be fantastic" he grinned even wider, and set her down in the grass and letting go of her butt and her shoulders. She lay back on the grass and groaned, she was going to start a fire, probably. Closing her eyes and cursing Finn's stupid mistake, she waited for the worst. But the worst did not come. In fact, opening her eyes and struggling to sit up, she realized that the grass she was on was only sort of singed. She looked up at Finn, who pulled her finally into a sitting position, and crossed her legs for her.

"Put out your hand" he said in a commanding tone, and she slowly did so. Her once petite hands were now calloused; being a hands-on queen was harder than it looked. Leader of the not-evil Fire Kingdom, Queen Rose Linen. Of course, she heard the name when Finn was muttering under his breath as he left the Fire Kingdom when she overthrew her dad, and no-one called her that: it was just something to write in journals and sign documents with. But what had she been thinking about before? Hmm. Oh yes! She wasn't burning the Grasslands to a crisp! Just as that entered her mind, it exited her mouth;

"Finn, why the trapezoid am I not burning this place to the ground? Aren't I supposed to be like, a WMD when it comes to this place?" she asked, only realizing its seriousness as she said it. She wasn't capable of burning measly pieces of grass? The thorns on Finns arm slowly receded, and a multitude of vines wrapped around her hand, one of which slowly entered the open wound. Finn stared at her solemnly; whatever his answer was, she probably wasn't going to like it. She was surprised when he started talking as if he had prepared the speech weeks ago.

"Well, y'know how what made you so dangerous was your elemental matrix? Well, according to PB, it's not some metaphorical mental mumbo jumbo. Your elemental matrix is a real physical 'thing' or whatever, and it sort of allows you to get enough uhh… nutrients out of just burning stuff. And the elemental matrix is like a long vein attached mostly to your back thing, breathin' things and your heart guts. I'm not too sure. But I like… when I- I…"

He was tearing up, but he soon calmed himself down and continued, his confidence faded

"So… when I… When I broke your back thing it also broke a big part of your elemental matrix. So, if PB's right… You are sorta half elemental now. I don't know what the other half is. The only thing I know is that you… you have to eat and drink like I would, so no fire kingdom food, and you need flame shield to stay in the fire kingdom for extended periods of time".

"Oh glob… Oh glob…"

As he'd been talking, the vines on her hand had receded back into his arm, leaving it completely healed. She was on the brink of crying, and she managed to get out a "Finn…" before he cut her off by nervously saying

"It's all right though! I can get a whole bunch of snacks and drinks and candy before we go from my house! And I'll carry you around a whole bunch and we can do whatever you want. I can even cast flame shield by myself now, look!" He demonstrated by slapping her in the face with his vine arm hard enough to make her fall over. Before she could say anything, he softly put her hand in his own and used his vine arm to lift her back into sitting position slowly and carefully. He slowly lifted her hand in front of her face, and it was now an incredibly vivid green.

"See! Grass magic! FP, don't worry. It'll be fine. I _**PROMISE**_."

She sniffled a bit, and wiped some unusually lukewarm tears from her face. She looked down at her now green hands, and back up at—WOAH NELLY! His face was about a centimeter from her own, and he was staring at her like some sort of crazed maniac. With a missing tooth and the face of a 15 year old. She thought about this and giggled, and Finn laughed too.

Without warning, he hoisted her up with his grass arm, and carried her like she was some sort of goddess who was too good to get dirt on her feet. With the way Finn treated her, you could have mistaken that for the truth. But for now, she was just a cripple in the arms of a 15 year old. One day though, it would be just relaxing constantly, cuddling, hugging, drinking soda—_DRINKING SODA! _That was gonna be exciting! So even as Finn carried her towards the treehouse, she thought; _One day, when I'm no longer queen, that's my plan: Eat, Drink, Hug, Watch TV and sleep. That'll be awesome_.

**_A/N_**

**_wowee. at least one fantastic bastard has taken the time to review this story, so in honor of said fantastic bastard; here is another chapter! woohoo._**


	3. Visitor

FP was sitting on the couch inside the tree fort, holding a can of Lemonade in her hand (he'd told her she could have as much as she wanted) , staring at it as if it was a loaded gun. Finn, on the other hand, was in the other room gathering various snacks and drinks, as well as making phone calls to Jake, Marceline, PB and the like. He was pacing, and talking rapidly. He too, was sweating. They were both pretty nervous for two completely different reasons. FP was nervous because she was about to ingest something that had been deadly to her for a long time. In fact, it still would have been were it not for the fact that Finn never puts drinks in the refrigerator; he likes them warm, so he says. Finn on the other hand, was dealing with Jake screaming at him through the phone, shouting something along the lines of 'first you kill her, now you move in with her?!', and Marceline had simply said: 'I'll be right over', and PB honestly thought it was great, if only for the fact that she was no longer such a threat, and he would keep her in check.

When Finn finally came back into the room, FP had 2 empty cans in front of her, and looked giddy at the prospect of having Lemonade whenever she wanted. She was about to say something, but then none other than Marceline became visible and plopped down on the couch next to her, along with Finn

"Hey Flame Chick. Sorry about your legs"

"Oh, its fine, hehe. They don't really hurt, and Finn's been carrying me around!" they both laughed at this, when Marceline floated off of the couch and above Finn.

"Seriously weenie?" Marceline turned over in the air, looking at him from upside-down, "Wow, her knight in shining armor. Too bad you broke her."

Finn looked genuinely hurt. He didn't say anything though, there was nothing he could say. But whatever, he was fine! He didn't care about what Marcy said. Or that's what he told himself.

"Anyway, Fire Chick, I'm here to cut a deal with you: You let me live in the Flame Palace, I can grant you free access to the Nightosphere's flame pits" she said as she slowly lowered herself back to the couch.

"What? Why would you need to live in the Fire Kingdom? And why the banaynanays would she want access to the Nightosphere?"

"Well Finny, Donny decided it would be funny to trick a gumball guardian into lasering my house to bits. And, as you should know, flame people eat coal. Which can be found in abundance in the Nightosphere's fire pits. You get it now, weenie?"

"Yes" both FP and Finn answered, still confused.

"Sooooo. Do we have a deal?" Marceline asked, trying not to sound forceful.

"Oh sure Marceline! It'd be nice to have some friends around besides CB" FP answered, unaware of what, or who she had just dissed; Finn suddenly stood up and angrily said

"Hey, am I not your friend?! What the heck—" Finn was cut off by FP snickering and whispering something in his ear. His cheeks flushed red and he quietly said 'oh' and sat down again. He sighed and grabbed a can of Lemonade. _Crack- fsss!_ He poured it into a plastic cup and took a sip.

"So Finn…"

"Yeah FP?"

"Finn; what exactly are you bringing to the Fire Kingdom?" she asked: if Finn was anything, he was not a good planner.

"I'll get it and show you FP! Mang, I hope I brought the right stuff" he said, and suddenly, one of the few remaining vines in the treehouse sprang into action, and started slithering around like a snake. The vine slowly slithered out the door. After about a minute, it was back, and slowly dragging an absolutely _HUGE _green backpack. It finally was dragged up onto her lap, and the vine slowly curled around her foot for no apparent reason. Reflex, she assumed, like a baby grabbing your finger.

She slowly opened the huge bag and inside was… wow; there was a _lot _of stuff. There were several red and blue shirts, a single pair of blue shorts, a few pairs of black sooty shorts, a folded up flame suit, some books and tomes, a plastic container filled with little candies that looked like strawberries but were a brilliant emerald green, and a whole bunch of other snacks.

"Wow, Weenie; looks like you planned ahead for once" Marceline remarked, getting up from the couch.

"So, Finn, when are we leaving? For the fire kingdom, I mean" FP asked, cracking open another Lemonade (dang that stuff was delicious)

"Doesn't Marceline have to pack?" Finn asked

"One step ahead of you, weenie" she said confidently, taking a small amulet out of her pocket and putting it on.

"What _is_ that, Marceline?" Finn asked worriedly: last time she had worn an amulet she had been turned into the ruler of the Nightosphere against her will.

"It's an amulet that opens a portal to my room in my dad's castle. You know, where my stuff is."

"Oh, that makes sense I guess" he said, as Marceline floated over to get the last can of Lemonade. Flame Princess then repeated her question:

"When are we leaving?"

"Oh! We can go now, if you want. We've packed at most of the jazz we need, and we should leave soon anyway before Jake gets here and goes crazy at us"

"Ok guys, let's go!" FP said excitedly, fist pumping. Despite being unable to walk, she was having a great time trying new 'human' things. Not that she was human. Finn picked her up off the couch, with his vine arm now wrapped around her body, from her chest to the very tips of her toes.

Soon they were out the door, with Finn's vine arm carrying the massive backpack in a similar fashion to the way it was carrying her. Marceline was floating just behind them, still drinking that can of lemonade. She used the time she had to think (not fall asleep; she was 16 for globs sake!). What _were_ flame people when their elemental matrix was damaged or removed? Were they like, human or what? After a while it started raining, and Finn's grass arm quickly turned into a cocoon around her, which she thought was unnecessary. But it was comfortable. And, snug. Warm too. She hadn't felt physical warmth when she was a fire elemental: she always felt cold and alone. Then Finn came along and warmed her with his hugs… and then broke her heart later. But, if vowing to carry someone around forever wasn't a sign of his utter devotion, then she didn't know what was. She wondered if her father treated her mom like that. Maybe… she yawned… maybe she could ask him. Ah, what the heck. She closed her eyes and let the clutches of sleep take her.

**A/N**

**oh look: Marceline the weenie Queen has decided to tag along. But of course someone as badass as Marceline is taking PB's original place in this story. And she's here to stay. I'm thinking of some pretty cool interactions between FP, FK, Finn, CB and Marceline. Mostly disapproving CB and Mocking FK. heh**


	4. Asphyxiation

**A/N Before I do anything, I just wanna explain some stuff to you. First of all, FP is about a year older than Finn here, and is very calm. Finn is still superior when it comes to fighting, especially with his incredibly overpowered vine arm. He does **_**not **_**control his vine arm directly; rather, it acts based upon his emotions. E.g. if he wants to beat the stuffing out of a guy, his vine arm will do it without being 'told' to. He also is a lot more charismatic at times, and that'll be explained later. A lot of this will be explained later but since 'later' is later, I felt like it would be fairer to tell y'all now and avoid confusion**

An older Finn was standing at the end of a gargantuan obsidian room staring up at Flame King, who had fireballs in his hands. FK laughed and boomed "FOOL! YOU THINK YOU CAN STOP ME?". Finn smirked evilly. His face was a sickly green, and his eyes were shining a brilliant emerald, like someone had turned a green floodlight on and focused it into two small points. His vine arm was many times longer than his other, wrapping around his waist at least a dozen times. The flower on his shoulder was no more, and instead was a large wicked thorn the size of a dagger. There were similar thorns trailing down to his elbow, where one jutted off perpendicular to the rest. His vine arm slowly unwrapped itself from around his waist and he cracked it like a whip, chuckling as if it were the funniest thing in the world. Flame King chose that moment of 'distraction' to unleash a barrage of elemental fury upon Finn, who was still laughing. They all made their mark. Just as the smoke cleared, a vine came from nowhere and wrapped itself around Flame King's chest. Finn was laughing maniacally now, and he slowly emerged from the shadows. Vines were around his neck too, and there were new thorns and flowers sprouting out of his shirt, which was covered in blood. His left leg was gone and so was his right foot. Vines were now slowly bursting from his flesh, bloodying the cauterized stumps once more. Soon there were new vine appendages replacing the lost ones, all covered in blood. The vine on Flame King's chest was slowly tightening, and soon the copper armor started crumpling. FK cried out in pain, as Finn drew ever nearer. Just as Finn reached him, the vine crumpled FK's entire chest like a tin can. Just then, a bird landed on Finn's shoulder. It was… the Cosmic Owl. It screeched in his face and flew off.

Her eyes shot open. She was still breathing quite heavily from the nightmare. She wiped the tears off of her cheeks and slowly pressing against the vines. She could hear hundreds of muffled voices from beyond those walls. There weren't any thorns in the cocoon luckily, and small berry-like things illuminated her forearms and chest. After observing the inside of the little bed, she took a deep breath and pushed with her hands and feet. The increased tension tore two small holes in the vines, one letting her toes out and tickling her surprisingly petite feet with stray vines which were slithering all around her toes, and the other about the size of her face.

She was immediately blasted by unbearable heat, blasting away any memory of the dreamcv. The massive pressure change sucked the air out of her lungs and covered her face with her own hair. She immediately started hacking and coughing; her lungs were now unsuited to the levels of soot and ash, and her nose seemed hyper-sensitive. She was wheezing and spluttering, and tears filled her eyes. Her face was burning and she couldn't handle the putrid stench of sulfur. Her senses were overwhelmed: _how had Finn ever handled _this_? _She put a hand through the hole and tugged on Finn's shirt. He looked down at her and almost immediately a vine brushed her hair out of her face and tapped her nose, casting flame shield. She was relieved of the heat and smell, but she was still having trouble breathing. She could hear herself wheezing even over the crowd. The vine cocoon unfurled revealing her dress to be covered in petals. Finn pulled her up higher and kissed her confidently on the lips, even though hundreds of strangers were staring on. She laughed and pushed Finn away, earning her a fake pout and a poke in her arm. Soon they were at the door of the palace, where people tried to avoid. Two guards greeted them nervously and opened the door: Finn scared the pants off of them, as did FP. The pair just laughed again and entered a large corridor with another large door at the end. As soon as they were inside though, Marceline appeared, and Finn screamed. Both Marceline laughed and FP sort of wheezed happily at his overly girlish squeal, and soon they were all chatting happily.

"So, FP, is anything different about the Flame Kingdom from what you remember?"

"Well… It's pretty hot and *wheeze* stinky here, and I *wheeze* … I'm having a pretty hard time *wheeze* breathing…"

"Oh, ok. Uh hang on, I think I got something for that" Finn looked around for some reason, and then used his grass arm to place her on his back. And _grod_, was she heavy. He swayed quite exaggeratedly and pretended to groan in pain as he tried to regain his balance. This earned a fat joke from Marceline and a scowl from FP. She was wrapped tightly to his back, with her knees bent and her feet limp, dragging behind him. He shrugged a couple times to get his backpack to fall from underneath her and to the floor.

"Let me see here… Aha!" Finn had pulled some sort of flower out of his backpack. Marceline raised an eyebrow.

"This, is possibly the most valuable flower in existence" Finn started, displaying the admittedly beautiful flower

"Finn, I appreciate the gesture, but your girlfriend is right here" Marceline snickered

"And it has magical properties, one of which is supplying the holder with 100% pure oxygen, which is more than twice as much as you get normally" Finn continued, unhindered by Marceline's interruption "So that sort of makes it easier on your lungs and eyes, is my point" he finished. He was beaming as he handed the rose over his shoulder to FP; this really _was_ incredibly valuable, and he'd gotten it off Choose Goose for information: PB's first name (only Marceline, him and Ice King knew it was Bonnie at the time). She took it in her hands and gasped. She took deep breaths: fresh air. She guessed the elemental matrix was more important than Finn thought, because Finn was doing fine and she had almost asphyxiated.

He brought her back over to his front and carried her Bridal style, with Marceline in tow. They walked along the corridor, had one or two Flame people walking along it. They greeted them quietly and moved along.

"So Flame Princess; how bad is the air here anyway? I can't really notice any difference" Finn asked absentmindedly, eyes drifting from her face to her legs, then to her arms and her face again. He kept on looking her over for a solid 30 seconds. She noticed.

"Finn. Why are you looking at me like that?" She asked quietly; Marceline's comments wouldn't help in any way. She was actually curious. He'd looked at her plenty before, why not look ahead?

"Oh! Uh, you just look a bit… uh… since the last time I saw you… you've…" he paused, and took a deep breath;

"You got fat" nervously, smiling awkwardly. Did she? She looked down, squirming to get her arms free of Finn's grip. She moved her hands to her abdomen and did in fact, manage to grab fistfulls of flab. Huh.

"Not that I care! I don't care at all—" Finn said quickly

"Pff, it's all right. Why would I care?" she said a confidently, puffing out her chest. Which didn't look like much considering she was a Princess in a Hero's arms. Or arm and vine. Finn laughed nervously,

"Well when Lady was preggurs Jake said something like that and she flipped her biz all over the place, it was crazy!"

"Well unless I look like I'm pregnant, don't bother trying to sugar-coat things. Honesty policy, remember?"

He was silent for a second, when he started

"Well—"

Suddenly, none other than Cinnamon Bun appeared. He had a cardinal's uniform on and he looked pretty different from when Finn had last seen him. Mostly because Finn was tall enough to see over his head now: he and FP were both crazy tall for their ages. CB looked very angry and shouted at Finn

"What the Glob do you think _you're _doing here!?"

**A/N**

**Oh crap. FP got Fat. They both got tall. Why the heck I did not put this in the first chapter? You'll never know. ****ALSO CROAK DREAM FOR FK. And the Vine arm will have a big role to play in this story (mentally and physically).** If anything _**too **_**ridiculous happens, be sure to either tell me or blame it on magic.**


	5. Flame Palace

Flame Princess stared hard at CB, brushing some hair out of her eyes. What did he mean 'what the hell are you doing here?' Finn was a friend, no one could really stop Marceline from being there, and she was the glob dang _ruler_ of the kingdom! She was about to voice that but Finn beat her to it.

"What do you mean 'what the hell are you doing here'?" He said angrily. He was _not_ in the mood right now, and FP was peeved too. Cinnamon Bun seemed to ignore Finn and stared hard at her. Finn handed her to Marceline, taking deep breaths.

"CB, answer him" she said a little too loud.

"Well I thought you didn't like Finn since he lied to you and broke your heart!" CB said defensively, putting emphasis on 'broke your heart'. Finn scowled at CB, as did Flame Princess.

"Seriously CB? Are you kidding? Finn said he was sorry, and I forgave him! It's not like he's dangerous or anything!" she cried out in exasperation; Cinnamon Bun hated Finn, apparently, and he had made sure everyone knew. Even after her father broke loose, he still didn't want Finn anywhere near Flame Princess.

"Well then how do you explain your legs?" he said triumphantly, somehow expecting Finn to just leave. He didn't, but he looked like he might.

"It was an accident" he whispered, doubting himself even as he said it. Had it been? He didn't really mean to hurt her, did he? No, he wasn't going to let himself think like that;

"It was an accident!" He said more confidently, "And what does it matter? If she really was that _pissed_, she would have tried to kill me over it. So what if you and your made-up world say I want to _hurt her_?! I don't think I should even listen to you, you idiot!" he said, voice rising. His vine arm was writhing and squirming, slowly growing wicked at the end and longer and more intimidating.

"Kingdom of Lies?! Are you fucking kidding? Princess Bubblegum fixed all of your mistakes and _created you_, and didn't expect anything back except loyalty! But _no,_ you had to betray everyone! You sent me _letters_ about how I should fucking feel ashamed about myself! " he practically screamed down at CB, eyes glinting green. He slammed his now massive vine arm into the wall, crushing an armor stand like paper and tearing out a good chunk of obsidian.

He took a deep breath and quietly continued "So if you think you have an excuse to cause any more trouble… you don't. Just…" Finn sighed. He was out of steam. He sighed and just kept on walking, leaving a wrecked wall and a cowering CB behind. His vine arm half-receded, still thorny and wicked at the end. Marceline actually set her feet to the ground, and started walking too. She didn't seem too surprised at his outburst. Then again, Marceline had spent more time with Finn than most. Flame Princess on the other hand, was kind of relieved. Cinnamon Bun sort of got what was coming to him, she supposed.

The next few hours were a blur. Being handed between Finn and Marceline, being carried around. People talking about her legs and elemental matrix. Vines incrementally wrapping around her thighs and abdomen, slowly squeezing her. She was abnormally tired & hungry, only after a few hours. She yawned loudly and tapped on Finn's shoulder, getting his attention. She smiled at him and he smiled back. They were on a couch in a room on the upper levels of the castle; she was leaning on him, and he had his vine arm wrapped around her shoulder and belly a few times. There were volcanic glass windows, dark and murky. But they revealed the brilliant lights of the fire of thousands. People working, playing, loving. Lava golems walked down the avenue they had walked in on; to the outskirts of the city. There was a permanent ashen sky, with the occasional streak of fire flying across. Massive volcanoes slowly spewed ash into the air, and magma dribbled down from their peaks slowly. The magma flowed down into a small uninhabited valley to the right of the castle, lighting up massive chasms and the beautiful crystals that lay within. There were intimidating black spires jutting up and out of the low skyline, massive flaming runes floating around them and maintaining the ebb and flow of energy: from the earth and into the people. It was absolutely stupendous in Finn's mind, but in hers it was just another lava land.

"Beautiful" he whispered in awe.

"Yeah, I guess. Oh, I just remembered; do we have anything to eat? I'm starved." She said warmly, trying to gently redirect his thoughts.

"Oh, uh, yeah! Totes!" he forced, stifling a yawn. He opened his backpack. Marceline rolled her eyes. Flame Princess giggled.

"Here." He said tiredly, handing her a sandwich. She wolfed it down. Why was she so hungry? And tired? Something to do with her matrix, probably. She moved her hands down to her numb hips, squeezing at the flab. She needed to go on a diet or something. Later. She'd eat as many sandwiches as she wanted until then. And Finn probably wouldn't care anyway: he never was one to care about figure and that junk. Finn would probably still love her if she was like, as big as a house. She giggled at the thought: Queen Fatso. Psh.

Her royal armor was on a table in the middle of the room, along with another set that she didn't recognize.

"Finn, what's that other piece of armor?" She asked, pointing at it. It was an iridescent blue, with a visor and helmet; it looked like some futuristic biz from space. His vine arm slowly extended out from under her and grabbed it, shakily dropping it on her lap. He looked at her and he looked damn tired. He hadn't slept since they had left the treehouse, over 24 hours ago. He yawned and looked like he was about to say something, but instead his head fell down onto her shoulder. She groaned, and tried to push him off her, but he wouldn't budge. After about a minute of squirming, she managed to get his face directly into her chest. Blushing madly, she quietly said

"Psst, Marceline"

"Uhhnnnn?" Great. She was asleep too. Uhg. Finn wrapped his arms around her and violently tugged her down into a lying position, and squeezed her like a teddy bear. UHG. She looked out the window for a while, but all that earned her was being covered by Finn's drool. UHG! She sighed and gave up; she was tired too, and it's not like she was going to wake up either of them at the risk of being karate chopped in the face. She closed her eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep.

**A/N**

**guys finn's gonna DIE from being smothered by flame princess. dammit. i had a whole story planned out and he just dies? also cb gets the crap beaten out of him. yay!**


	6. Armor

**A/N Trying to decide between writing and drawing and gaming… HNGGG**

He was in front of the couch, with an almost full set of armor set on the obsidian coffee table. His vine arm was strapping on Flame Princess' bulky breastplate, which was very thick, and looked like it was built for someone a lot more... curvaceous. Guess they weren't risking anything considering her volatile father. And boyfriend. And guest. Oh, who was he kidding; they were all incredibly dangerous. And he now held the title of 'royal bodyguard' after Finn was flipping his biz at CB, who was nowhere to be found. FP was obviously worried.

"I'm your official bodyguard now, ok?" He said reassuringly, struggling to strap on a pair of iridescent blue greaves with his left hand. They were infused with magic, reinforcing and cooling the metal to incredible levels. The cool metal made him shiver; wearing a suit made of the stuff must suck.

"Yeah, that's pretty cool" she said; "I think you're probably at least as capable as Cinnamon Bun anyway"

"Hmm. I guess. What was CB like anyway? You know, as a knight"

"He was… O.K. I guess. Well, not really. He tried but he just kept being like, self-centered and condescending; he acted like he was—"she gasped. Finn had finally managed to strap the breastplate on and its strong flame wards were negating fresh air from her flower.

"Oh, does that hurt? Crud" he said in exasperation. "Hang on, lemme try something" he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He concentrated, then exhaled slowly. His vine arm slithered around to her back and unstrapped the leather bindings of her breastplate. It fell to the floor with a loud clang, and she gasped again, fresh air returning. She soon felt cool, smooth vines slowly wrapping around her abdomen, over and under her pajama shirt. The vines continued to wrap around her, and felt as smooth as a flat piece of volcanic glass. They writhed and turned and slowly 'slotted' themselves into place. They seemed to fit exactly, like puzzle pieces slotted around her body. This was no different for her chest

"Glob Finn, you're such a perv" she said sarcastically and giggled. His eyebrows knotted and he stopped fabricating the armor, leaving the ends of the vines to slap annoyingly against her face and stomach. He sighed and scratched his nose with a thorn on his arm, drawing blood. He didn't seem to care, and smudged the blood all over his face before returning to the armor. The vines slowly made their way around her hips, up to her neck, and down to her toes. Finally, he plopped down on the couch, turning to her and asked

"How is it?"

"Well, we'll have to look in the mirror to see, but it feels pretty nice. Airy and snug, if that makes any sense" she said the last part slowly, not quite understanding it herself. "So anyway, can you pick me up and take me over to the mirror?" she asked, pointing to a body-sized mirror leaning against the wall. Finn nodded, stood up swiftly, and instead of moving her, moved the mirror. He casually lifted it up with his vine arm, and a bit too violently put it down in front of her.

Marceline's fist was centimeters from his face before he cried out and flicked his vine arm. It cracked like a whip, getting a magnificent scream from Marceline. Marceline sprung up like a cat on steroids and clung to the rood, glinting her fangs. Finn and FP were laughing maniacally at her reaction, and started laughing harder when they took a better look at her on the roof. She was wearing pink flannel pajamas covered in what looked like chocolate bars. That, combined with Hambo's cotton brains being squeezed out in her grip, left them laughing for a good 5 minutes.

"Not funny, guys." She growled, trying to squeeze into some skinny jeans after taking off her PJs, which were promptly thrown into the corner.

"You're right, it wasn't funny" Finn snickered, trying to calm himself down. Not on her watch

"Yeah, it was hilarious!" She cried out and Finn started laughing again. Marceline groaned and did up her belt, not bothering to respond. Marceline then proceeded to float out of the room grumbling, arms folded and hair sprawled out like some sort of demented cotton candy. She wiped a tear from her eye and eventually turned to the mirror that was still in front of her, albeit cracked and slanted. Finn, now fully clad in his armor, practically leaped on to the couch next to her and grabbed her by the shoulder, grinning. They both looked into the mirror, and took the first good look at themselves in a while.

Flame Princess had been completely covered by not only vines, but seemingly gigantic leaves and flowers, with a particularly large flower on her shoulder, similar to Finn's own. She had particularly oversized boots made of glistening, oily leaves with small gaps that showed stark contrast with her golden skin. Her abdomen was completely encased in vines that hugged her frame, and moss smothered every vine with an extra generous helping of clovers. Her right arm was significantly more heavily armored than her left; vines forming into thick, calloused hands that looked identical to Finn's own. Her other arm however, left her left hand uncovered, which was in stark contrast to the armor itself. Her skin no longer glowed; no longer luminescent but still a magnificent golden orange. Her hair had also changed, now falling down just past her broad, leafy shoulder plates, with a dark red shade that seemed unnatural to a being of fire. Her eyes glowed a mysterious green, like Finn's. "Grass Magic" PB had said. Must be pretty powerful, she supposed.

Speaking of powerful, Finn looked incredible in his armor. It was an absolutely fantastic cyan color, with a midnight blue aura surrounding him. The armor looked like it had been fashioned out of Ice and thunder, though that might have been to melodramatic now that she thought about it. The rims of the plates were made of glass tubes, with a mysterious sky blue liquid flowing through them. His vine arm had started to consume some of the armor; vines busting through the chinks in the plating and grabbing them. More surprisingly, there was a massive broadsword made of a giant palm leaf, which seemed to slice through the floor.

He squeezed her tighter and turned his head from the mirror to her face. She turned to him. The next thing she knew, the two of them were making out in full suits of armor, with Finn's broadsword curving around one of her limp hips. The vines around her slowly went limp and fell off, and eventually they became tangled in them. Still making out.

**A/N**

**sorry u guise. I've been playing waaay to much factorio and I forgot to write this. Also who the fuck makes out fully armored? These two ding-dongs**


	7. Long Day

"Oh, you have _got _to be kidding me" Marceline groaned as she floated back into the 'lounge' room where she had left Finn and Flame Princess. She had combed her hair, grabbed a strawberry from her pack and tried to spook as many dimwitted guards as she could, only to come back to these two making out in _full suits of armor_. She thought about scaring them – they hadn't noticed her yet – but then decided against it; Finn would probably take her head off. So she slowly floated out of the room and back into the maze of corridors.

There were various flame elementals of different shapes and sizes strolling down the halls, most of whom were carrying large stacks of… something in their hands. Paper? Not quite, it seemed. As a pair of particularly short flame people carried stacks of the stuff, it revealed an oily sheen that isn't associated with normal paper. So that explains that. She opened a particularly large door at the end of the hallway, and found herself in the throne room of the palace. Business as usual, by the look of things. Nothing out of the ordinary—well, would you look at that? Flame King's locked in that stupid lantern!

Now it was all coming back to her; Finn telling her about his breakup with Flame Princess and his meticulous description of the events thereafter. One of which was Flame King being locked up by his daughter. Daddy issues, huh? She floated cautiously over to the giant glass candle-holder; she may be immortal, but she is as sure as hell that she can still feel pain. She stops when her face is almost pressed up against the dull orange glass. She tapped the glass slowly, making sure not to possibly aggravate him. That would be—

"BUHH! WHO'S THERE?" FK shot up and 'accidentally' stomped on DJ's head.

"Oh… it's _you_" he spat, staring at Marceline menacingly. He removed his foot from DJ's head and stood up a little straighter when DJ swore at him.

"Well, Frederick, I didn't expect to see you again. In _here _of all places" she said nonchalantly, using the flame royal's real name to try and intimidate him. It didn't work.

"I could say the same to you, _Abadeer_" that coaxed a few gasps out of the servants, only to be swiftly put down with a "WILL YOU CUT THAT OUT!" from FK.

"So, how's life been, FK?"

"It's been fine, thank you very much"

"You sure about that?" she said, knocking on the glass of his prison "Because it doesn't look 'Fine' to me"

"Yes, it's splendid. This kingdom is more prosperous than ever before"

"You're not wrong… it's changed a lot for the better since I was here last

Marceline raised an eyebrow, "How does this affect you, might I ask?"

"Oh, don't you think I have even the tiniest amount of influence over what my daughter says and does? Her alignment may have been… redirected by Finn, but she is still truly evil, and can be influenced as such" he said condescendingly. No sooner as he said that, Finn and Flame Princess burst into the room. FP had a bowl of crackers cradled in her arms, and Finn was awkwardly munching on a quickly melting chocolate bar.

"This is going to be a _long _day" he mumbled.

"Sorry we're late guys!" FP called out, waving her arm "You can get back to doing your royal duties"

"Mmphh mph mphhhh!" Finn said, though his mouth was full of chocolate so it was undiscernible from anyone's perspective but his own. Finn bounded over to the throne and unceremoniously dropped FP onto it, and then sat down himself next to her. It was a tight fit, but they managed. They started chatting happily, and barley noticed Marceline and FK at all. Marceline stared at the pair for a while; she didn't know how Finn would handle the incredible boredom that came with ruling a kingdom. That damn kid could barely sit still for 12 seconds, let alone 12 hours. If he were with anyone else, that is. Those two seemed to be mediators for each other; FP would stop Finn from going into mental breakdown, and Finn would stop FP from killing anyone.

"Can you say _healthy relationship_?" she muttered under her breath. This was going to be a long day.

Soon enough, Finn and FP were sprawled onto the throne, sweating bullets. FP groaned and slowly sat up, wiping her face with Finn's hat. Someone was in front of her, asking about the weather or some crap like that. She saw that Finn had fallen asleep with a half-eaten cracker in his mouth, and was mumbling something about something called "meat man" or whatever. She took a swig from the water bottle that Finn had given her. Blech. It was warm. Until recently, everything had felt cold, at least relative to her. And now she was getting tired, and hot, and sweaty when she would have previously been A-OK.

"Yes? What do you want?" She said grumpily to the rather small man in front of her, stirring Finn from his sleep.

"Well, I was looking for a job opportunity, and I saw that one of your guards had left recently, right?" he said in a rather… odd accent

"Mhmm" she mumbled, while Finn grabbed hold of her head and used it to hoist himself up out of his sleepy demeanor.

"Well, I saw that sign over there and thought 'this is brilliant!', so I have come over to your royal highness; your royal highness being _you,_ and I want to ask if I can have the, err, guard job"

"Kay" she said uninterestedly, turning to Finn who once again was trying to get up out of his slouch.

"Really? Oh, that's bloody brilliant!" he said happily, and ran off to wherever that guy lived.

She took another gulp of water. This was going to be a long day.

**A/N **

**God, I am actually really sorry that I took this long guys. And by guys I mean the 100 people who have seen this story, which in retrospect is a lot. So yay storytelling! Also i like to imagine the gaurd applicant at the end has the same voice as Stephen Merchant. hehehehe**


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